GodsendJen

So far the Falcons have missed 6 of 8 field goal attempts.  Everyone in the media is singing our praises but that wont last if we keep passing up the easy points. Len P summed up our kicking performance in today's game quite well:

Second-year veteran Michael Koenen, who is handling all three kicking chores for the Falcons, missed four field goal attempts Sunday and squandered an opportunity to bury the Bucs early. Koenen was an equal opportunity scattershot kicker, missing wide left twice (from 36 and 40 yards), wide right once (30 yards) and having a 30-yard effort blocked. In two games, Koenen has now converted 2 of 8 attempts. His six misses are three times as many as last year's kicker, Todd Peterson, had for the Falcons.

I think our cap guy needs to crunch some numbers tonight and find a way to get us a real kicker.  I would be happy if we just brought Peterson back.  I don't know who he ticked off but he never missed a gimmie indoors from 30 yards.  We can still let Koenen have a shot at the stuff outside 45 yards.  If we really can't bring outselves  to pay for a kicker then we should turn this into a marketing gimmick and just pick some lucky fan to attempt our field goals.  They would have just as much luck as Koenen and we wouldn't feel nearly as bad when they miss.

For a few days now I've listened to the talking heads at ESPN promote "Separation Saturday" on ESPN and ABC this Saturday.  For those of you who have a life they are referring to the weekend's college football schedule.  This is a great schedule for fans.  There are seven games where ranked opponents face off against one another, and as the name suggests it should do a bit to separate the contenders from the pretenders.  But really, do we need to brand it and turn it into marketing hype?  What's wrong with saying "This is a great weekend for good college football...real matchups not gimmies are on the schedule?"   Instead all you hear from the talking heads all week is "Separation Saturday....games at noon, 3 and 8 pm." And besides, if you are going to market it do it right.  Don't make it sound like the day a divorcing couple is packing up their belongings.  This guy has the right idea.  He assigns a theme, but then goes on to explain it.  (And Joe, if you read this you will have to forgive me for linking to the site of a Michigan fan. But that poster is good stuff. Just remember that ND won. <oops! Guess I got ahead of myself.>)

Of course my team plays a patsy (Duke) but that is ok.  We prefer to play our big games on weekend when we don't have to share the slate with 12 other schools.  Personally I'm looking forward to the Louisville Miami game.  Its important to my team that Miami take care of business at this game.  Louisville lovers have been singing the Cardinals praises since back in their time at Conference USA.  I just don't buy into it.  We beat them last year just as soundly as we beat the Moutaineers.  I think the hype surrounding these teams is a conspiracy to make the Big Least sound like a real conference when everyone who watches football should be able to tell its mostly smoke and mirrors.  I'm just sorry that Bud Foster didn't call up Ralph Friegdan on Wednesday and offer up some tips on smothering that Rich Rodriguez spread offense.

I attended my first professional baseball game in May of 1990.  The only baseball games I'd attended before then were little league games that I had played in myself.  This was on a school trip to Atlanta when the Braves had been so perennially bad that our group tickets were incredibly good. Fulton County stadium was half empty, maybe more than half empty by the time the second rain delay arrived.  The Braves played the St. Louis Cardinals.  David Justice was the man and Steve Avery was every girl's eye candy.  The Brave's lost, but that was pretty typical of the team that finished in 6th place that year in the National League West.  For me none of that matter. I loved everything about it and a baseball fan was born.

All in all my baseball fandom has been one of relative luxury.  I relished the opportunity to watch the AAA team play in Richmond, especially those great rehab starts by the big boys on the mend.  Heck, the presence of the Braves even played a role in my decision to move down south. In all this time the closest I've come to rooting for a loosing team was the year I had season tickets in Baltimore.  Even then I was rooting for former Brave Javy Lopez way more than I was rooting for the O's.  

Yesterday my luxurious time as a baseball fan officially came to an end when the Braves were eliminated from the NL East race.  It was a nice run, but we've known since June that it was probably coming to an end.  Too much gone wrong in a year when everything went right for the other guys. A guess a girl can't expect to root for a winner every year--but thanks to Bobby and John I could pretend it was possible for a really long time.

I've been watching so much football I haven't taken the time to write about it. Rather than share more of my own blather (you know, Go Hokies, Go Falcons) here is some stuff I found interesting:

Technology at work in the VA Tech football program.  Its not just the body pod, its magic pills that transmit your core temperature back to a pda, shock detecting helmets and shirts that get hooked up to portable cooling systems.

A tear-jerker about Aaron Rouse and his decision to return for his last season at Tech.  Nothing like a sense of loyalty and a promise to his mamma.  If we do well this season his story will find its way into ESPN the Magazine or SI where it will become even more moving I'm sure.

My prediction for the most over-reported story of this season's Hokie football team.  One of seemingly 2 million stories on Brandon Ore's tenure at the 7-11 warehouse last spring. Yes it built character, whoopty-doo.

And let's not forget that Beamer Ball is back.  2 games and 3 blocks so far this year.  There was in interesting story about when and why Beamer Ball became so important.  Apparently we have to thank Deion Sanders and the whooping Florida State gave us way back in 1988 when he was their return guy.

On the pro front I do feel better after seeing the Falcons in action against the Panthers.  It's hard to tell how much we have improved given that Smith was out, but Abraham looked incredible.  I was disappointed in the performances of Roddy White and Ashlie Lelie.  Those two only combined for 10 yards receiving on a day when the offense was having its way with Carolina.  I love that we beat Carolina and Tampa Bay gets shut out by Baltimore.  Simms didn't look very good and with a bit of luck that will keep his confidence off balance when they play us next week.  If Abraham's late game injury wasn't serious then I'm confident he can rock Simms world--and wouldn't that be sweet.

The NBC NFL crew doesn't impress me.  They have 2 sideline reporters.  By my count that is 2 too many.  Add them to the mindless drivel that Maddens spouts forth and its enough to make you want to hit the mute button.  Of course all this pales compared to the new theme song that Pink belts out for them.  Its not that the song is bad, but it lacks energy and is an obvious knock-off of I Hate Myself for Loving You, a song that is apparently destined to be stuck in my head every Sunday night between now and the playoffs. I'm also sick of the endless commercials featuring Peyton Manning and his family.  I wish I had started counting them at kick-off today.  Somewhere there are college students taking shots each time one airs--and somewhere those college students are being admitted to the emergency room for alcohol poisoning.

How did your football season start if you are a fan of NorthEastern?  Well let's just take a snapshot of the first quarter:

• First possession, after getting sacked and making a stupid penalty you have to punt.  The opponent returns it to your 33.  Four plays later they score.
• Second possession, your QB is intercepted giving the oponant great field position at their own 45.
• Third possession, once again you punt--or at least you try.  The punt is blocked.  Three more plays and you are scored on again.

Now let's fast forward to the fourth quarter.  Your team is finally within field goal range with very little time left on the clock.  The field goal unit comes in and you think you just might get some points on the board before the game is over.  What happens?  The field goal attempt is blocked.

The lesson here?  If you are a 1-AA team don't start your season against a top 25 powerhouse--even if they are rebuilding.  It's just not pretty.

Turns out this is just a week for gadget finds that scare me.  Today's find is compliments of WSJ Technology Guru Walt Mosberg.  In today's journal Walt reviews a new toilet seat that warms, washes and dries the user. Walt says it best:

The Swash 800 doesn't have every bell and whistle of the top-of-the-line Toto models. For instance, it doesn't automatically raise and lower the toilet seat. But, like its rivals, it has three main features. The first are retractable, automated wands that spray water to cleanse the relevant body areas. The second is a warm air blower that dries those same spots. The third is a heated seat.

You don't have to buy a whole new toilet to use the Swash 800. It installs in place of your current toilet seat and hooks up to the existing plumbing valve that's behind your toilet.

Hrm...but how does it it do its thing?

A wireless remote control panel that runs on two AAA batteries controls the Swash's actions, and this remote can be mounted on a wall if you choose. Ten buttons and a display cover the front of this remote. The two wands are controlled by buttons on the remote grouped according to the gender of the user. There's a single "For Him" button that says "Back" and two "For Her" buttons labeled "Back" and "Front." These buttons are accompanied by icons showing anatomically vague stick figures.

For example, push the "For Her" front button and a pink wand releases a gentle spray. Each wand is rinsed before you use it, and after you arise from the seat, whether or not you used it.

Using the remote, you can adjust the force and temperature of the water, and the temperature of the heated seat. You must manually decide when to stop the water or air.

We found that the heated seat, which can be set to automatically turn off or on at certain times of the day, was a great feature. And the warm water -- once we got the temperature right -- was also a luxurious twist on the normal bathroom experience.

But, while the water was nice, the dryer was awful. It works only at one temperature and speed, and it didn't do the trick for us.

My verdict?  I don't anticipate trying one out any time soon....its just too weird. For what its worth these toilet seats are very popular in Japan--so maybe I'll try one on vacation someday.

WSJ Story

Brondell (The Toilet Seat Company)

Some days I sit around wondering why Geeks get such a bum rap from society about being strange. 

Then there are days like today, where the intersection of Geek and Capitalism come screaming at you from the shadows and frightens the bejeezus out of you.  Today is that day.  In my morning trolling of web sites to distract me from work I found Shiny Shiny.  This site is devoted to gadgets for women.  As long as you stick to the mobile phones and mp3 players its pretty innocuous.  Then I tripped on the landmine....a category called Furnishings and Furniture.  "Diamond Solitare" napkin holders, bizarre visual sensory chairs, furniture that can grow, fish that can't grow....well its just too much to take.  My favorites-- a vacuum cleaner lamp and a robotron toilet paper dispenser.  As friends you have the responsibility to shoot me if these items ever enter my house.

I went to the Falcons preseason opener against New England and I have to say the most astounding athletic feat was accomplished before the opening kickoff.  In case you missed it one of our beloved Frisbee-Dogs set the new indoor world distance record for catching a Frisbee.  His handler threw the Frisbee down field over 74 yards and the little pooch tracked it down and caught it.  (The handler really should get some of the glory, I mean how many people do you know who could throw a Frisbee straight 74 yards?)  Of course the local media is so wrapped up in their infatuation with D.J. Shockly ("Shock" as they call him) that they have completely failed to include the Frisbee dog in their post-game write-ups. Yes, D.J. managed to complete a 14 yard pass to put is in field goal range---but on his first drive he couldn't quite manage to keep the ball moving. Bryan Randel showed some amazing rushing ability on his drive, but his passing game was just ok.

How did the players who will actually see playing time this year fare? Our starting defense made it clear that all the hype is useless against the run.  Cory Dillon ran through them like water through a sieve.  John Abraham had a nice sack that forced a fumble...but that was against the second tier of New England players.  All I can say is if our run defense doesn't improve DeShawn Foster and Cadillac Williams are going to have their way with us in a most unpleasant fashion. 

As for the offense?  T.J. Duckett had a couple of nice runs.  Jurious Norwood looks like he might provide some sizzle.  Vick looks like his escapability is back, but the much touted chemistry between him and the young receivers might have been overstated. Michael Jenkins had a nice catch for a touchdown in the game (pass compliments of Matt Schaub I believe) but Roddy White didn't do anything worth mentioning.  We let Michael Koenen handle the field goal kicking and I have to say I thought he did a bang-up job.  The kicks all looked a bit lower than I'd be comfortable with, but the distances made up for it.  The distances ranged from 40-50 yards.  Maybe we should keep Yelk around for kick-offs and let Koenen handling the scoring opportunities.  I'll also take this opportunity to share a random fact garnered from the Shayne Graham chat transcript--the balls used in the NFL are harder than college balls.  Something tells me that affects kickers more than QBs and Receivers.

Here's hoping the offense and especially the defense can start living up to their hype when the season starts.

Football Football Football Football Football Football.....what do you do when your team ends the season playing like a bunch of low-class hooligans?  You weed out some bad apples and then impose martial law with some strict consequences.  This plan is how coach Beamer spent his offseason.  The AD took cares of that weed problem in the winter and now Frank is making it clear he's serious about stamping out sloppy play and bad decision making.  The Times-Disgrace explains (emphasis mine):

Post-2003, the issue was cleansing the squad of selfishness and leadership voids. This time, the focus is on cleaning up the program's act, a worthy goal. To that end, Beamer has expanded his system of punishments that covers such items as blowing off class and blowing out the refs and sideswiping opponents after the whistle blows and costing your crew 15 yards of real estate.

As always, players who miss class or get whistled for acting-out penalties will face early-morning running - but at 6 a.m. Sundays and not mid-week, as before. Chronic offenders will forfeit playing time. And - this being the hit-'em-in-the-wallet innovation in the penal code - those personal-foul and unsportsmanlike no-no's will cost the perps a portion of their bowl stipend for food and entertainment.

"We've just got to make sure we get to a bowl," Beamer said yesterday. "If we don't get to a bowl, my whole thing is screwed up."

Now this leaves me wondering a few things--like exactly how much is that stipend for food and entertainment? And why on earth doesn't this code of conduct address off-campus issues?  As I recall the young Mr. Vick's worst transgressions occured outside the confines of campus.  You have to start somewhere, and this is a good place, I just think they could have done more.

Word is also out that Beamer is ticked that our field goal and punt blocking has plummetted over the last 3 years.  It should be interesting to see what happens this year since he is putting a renewed emphasis on it.  With an unsettled QB and so manny new starters a few choice blocks--especially if they are returned for a score--could be the difference in a game.